I don't complain enough

If there is one thing which has been consistent for all of my life it is probably that is struggle to stick up for myself even when I know that something is not right. This means that I have spent a lot of my life getting picked on of taken advantage of. This is compounded by the fact that I don't like feeling as though I am letting someone down and I enjoy helping others.

At school this took the form of bullying and it was very obvious but now I am in the world of work things are a lot more subtle but never the less they are still there. This is so subtle that at first it isn't easy to notice, if fact it is only be comparing the way that you are treated against others that you realise that there is something wrong.

Over the years it has become increasingly clear to me that there are a lot of times when I get put into situations which others in my position would not but put into because they think that I am not going to make a fuss about it of stick up for myself. For the most part they have been correct so far, even when I have objected to these things my objections have been pretty weak. This means that for the most part they have got away with treating me in this way meaning that in the future they are more likely to do such things again.

This makes me wonder where I would be if I had learnt to stand up for myself a bit more. How many times have I been passed over for promotion because they thought that someone else would leave or make more of a fuss if they didn't get it? How many times have I been given less of a pay rise because they know I wouldn't complain? How many times have I been pushed to work too hard because they knew I wouldn't kick up a fuss about it?

I know that there is nothing I can do about the past to correct what could have been. The only thing I can do is try to make things better for myself going forward and ensure that I stand up for myself a little bit more.

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